Three Methods to Uncover Your Ideal Career
Author: Nicky J. Davies |
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Categories: Career Reset
Are you living “your idea of what you think somebody else’s idea of yourself should be”?
This quote really sums up the tangle of knots our thinking can get us into. When young we love exploring and discovering more about the world we live in and who we are. I remember spending many hours playing in the ‘haunted house’ nearby (an abandoned farmhouse), disturbing the slumber of owls, eating blackberries and running home with our faces smeared with the evidence.
That freedom came with some important life lessons given by well intentioned adults about how we should behave, how we should conform, and what expectations we should deliver on. Much of this shaped our beliefs and decisions made as we got older, and if left unquestioned, we can end up living “your idea of what you think somebody else’s idea of yourself should be”.
So how do you know if you are doing this? Simple. On a scale of 1 to 10, how happy are you with your life?
Your answer to this one question says it all.
How you earn your income, your job, is probably a big factor in how happy you are with your life. We spend a third of our time at work on average, and that doesn’t include the thinking and planning we do outside of work hours.
If you know you are not happy in your current job, and you know it is to do with the type of work you are doing, but don’t know what you would really love to do I have some exercises you can use to answer this question and help you uncover your ideal career:
1. What did you love to do between the ages of 7 and 14?
Up until the age of 7, you fully integrated what you were told about how the world works into your belief systems. At the age of 7 or so, you started to question what you were told, and had a clear sense of the activities that you loved to do. So, what was it that you loved to do between the ages of 7 and 14?
I can remember creating mini plays that my sister and I would perform to an audience of adults who happened to be in the house at the time. I loved a board game where we took on the role of journalists reporting on incidents around the world – it was the travel and exploring that I enjoyed in that game. I loved helping friends solve problems or just talk through difficulties they were having. And I was a keen reader of detective or mystery stories. I held leadership roles in many of the activities I did outside of school.
What was it for you?
What insights does that give you?
Let go of the need to have a rigid view on what that could be. From my example, you could say that I would love to be a writer or producer / director of plays / films that are about solving mysteries, traveling the world. But this isn’t what I am doing and I am very happy with what I do. I get to write, create and deliver programmes that help people with their careers or leadership development. I travel and deliver these in many countries around the world, real-time or virtually. I also coach and mentor individuals, help them solve their own challenges around what to do with their lives, over come particular obstacles. And yes, I am the leader in my own business.
So, what could it mean for you? What would you love to do?
2. How does your life currently demonstrate what is important to you?
Start with what you know is true for you, not what you are told it should be by others around you or what you think the ‘right’ answer needs to be. The more honest you are with yourself,the better the result will be for you. Work your way through these key questions, come up with the top three answers to each thinking about your whole life making sure you are really specific:
i) What three things are easy for you?
Eg. For me it would be explaining things in simple ways, listening to others and being able to understand their perspective, organising and investing money to make a good return.
ii) How do you fill your personal space?
Eg. For me it would be my laptop, personal development reading materials, and my journal (grand title for what essentially is an exercise book with my scribblings in it).
iii)Where in your life are you most organised and disciplined?
Eg. For me it would be money management and investments, business appointments and tasks, and travel as I am often in two or three different countries every month of the year.
iv) What energises you the most?
Eg. For me it is helping others live more meaningful and inspiring lives, sailing and being outdoors in warm weather, and growing our investments.
v) How do you spend most of your time? Be really specific, don’t just put work as an answer.
Eg. For me it is teaching, coaching and writing.
Which ones are your overall top three answers that are repeated?
From my answers mine would be: business mission (teaching and coaching), investments, personal development. Notice I grouped teaching and coaching into business mission. This is because they are so entwined for me. You can group some together too if that makes sense to you when reading back through them.
What are your top three? How are they related? If your top three were combined into a possible business or career, what could that be? Be open to any answers that come to you, ignore any voice of concern about ‘yes but how…’ at this stage. The how comes later.
3. Ikigai – What is your reason for being?
Ikigai is a Japanese term which roughly translates to the "thing that you live for" but it also has the nuance of "the reason for which you wake up in the morning" similar to a daily purpose.
Each individual's ikigai is personal to them and specific to their lives, values and beliefs. It reflects the inner self of an individual and expresses that faithfully, while simultaneously creating a mental state in which the individual feels at ease. Activities that allow you to feel ikigai are never forced on an individual; they are often spontaneous, and always undertaken willingly, giving you satisfaction and a sense of meaning to life.
Think about what activities you would place in the different sections of this diagram to find your Ikigai:
So, what is your Ikigai? How far are you from experiencing this on a regular basis?
All three methods may bring you to a realisation that something needs to change.
I remember being brought up with the belief that ‘you can’t have everything’. You have to choose either option A or option B. I really questioned this when in my 30s and looking at my career to date. I asked myself whether I really had to choose between option A of having monthly paycheques and squeezing my love of traveling into a couple of weeks of holidays at a time, or option B going off traveling but making smaller amounts of money as I got low-paying jobs as I travelled.
I decided I wasn’t going to wait until retirement only to find out that this belief is not true. So I left my corporate job and designed my life to have the elements I wanted – travel, work with people and help solve some of their challenges in life by creating programmes for groups and coaching individuals.
And I would like to help you let go of some of the beliefs you hold true in order to live the life you truly desire.
“When the voice and vision on the inside becomes louder and more profound than all opinions on the outside you have begun to master your life.” Dr Demartini
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